Looks like we are done pumping.

7:21 am

Untitled, originally uploaded by indiaeden.

I haven't pumped milk for a week. We made it past Ernest's second birthday, and you know that mostly feels ok.
Two years is far from my ideal, both my older boys breastfed right into their fourth years, and only weaned because I was heavily pregnant with their next sibling. Even then, it was a gentle process.
I've tried to wean myself from the pump in a gentle way too.
Ernest was down to just two very small bottles of breastmilk, morning and night. Topped up with extra bottles of cows milk.
I'm sitting here now, finally free from the pump, but it still hangs there on the bed frame...I might put it away today.
Ernest will continue to have bottles of cows milk when he needs them. He still needs the comfort of sucking, and I'll never deny him that.

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  1. Oh Jeanette, I know this must be hard for you. I am finding it difficult to let go of some of my things right now. No one said that motherhood would get harder in some ways (and easier in others) as you get older. I tried pumping with Aimee when I couldn't get her to BF and it just didn't happen (I would be at it for hours and produced about a teaspoon. I think you have done AMAZINGLY well and one look at E tells that he is thriving well lol.

  2. I just want to say you are amazing. Us mums set incredibly high standards for ourselves, but can see amazing achievements in others. So believe me when I say that while two years of pumping might not have been your ideal, it is still a wonderful gift to have given him, and an astonishing feat. Really really incredible. I'm not sure, had I been in your situation, that I'd have been able to exclusively pump for even a month, let alone 24. xxx

  3. Gosh, can I relate. I've been one to not produce much. My 3 yr. old still comfort nurses.

  4. I've been wondering lately if you're still pumping. You're an amasing Mum to have stuck at it this long and looks like Ernest is absolutely thriving.

    Go gently on yourself. xx

  5. I know this must be so hard, but I know in time you will look back and be so proud of your achievements. There are not many out there who could have persisted with the breastfeeding like you did.
    I fed Angus for 15 months before he weaned himself. I wish I got to feed him for longer, but he called the shots (and I was in to the second trimester of Juliet's pregnancy). She's still feeding now at a few days shy of 12 months and I hope I get a bit longer with her. You are such an inspiration to me, please know that.

  6. You are truly an amazing mum, and an inspiration. Nothing else I can say, but to send gently hugs x

  7. you did a beautiful and hard thing, pumping for two years, and I know you desperately wanted it to be different (so many things should be different). I felt the same sadness when I let go of breastfeeding Vivi, I had done it two years with Finn, but for many reasons, it wasn't working with Vivien (nerves, let down problems, grief, all of that). Three years on and sometimes I expect to be healed from all the grief that ever was, but I think we might be expecting too much.


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