Catching Up

8:41 am


DSC_0036, originally uploaded by indiaeden.

We've been in Scotland for the past five days. We stayed in a cabin on the shores of Loch Lubnaig.
We almost had to cancel our trip after Woody, the boys and myself all came down with a violent stomach bug on Saturday night. We were fit to travel by Monday morning though, and with fingers crossed that the girls had escaped the bug we headed off.
I had a few little wobbles about being so far away from home, and more specifically away from my local hospital, my consultant and my midwife, and a bigger wobble when on Tuesday morning I blacked out for a second in the car. I'm certain it was only the remains of the bug plus a little low blood pressure. It didn't happen again.
Despite my wobbles and slight worries, it was good to get away. Of course I always feel I've abandoned Florence.
I bought lots of trinkets to decorate her grave, souvenirs from a holiday she could never go on. I'll take them to her today.
I also bought a little tweed rabbit for baby boy. I fell in love with tweed while away and have a million ideas in my head for a winter wardrobe and a few other things all made from beautiful tweed. I'm always relieved to know I can still be inspired, sometimes I think my brain is so weary from grief and from pregnancy after loss that there is no room left for creativity, but I have a page in one of my notebooks full of "Scottish inspiration" , and perhaps even some plans to keep me busy over the next few weeks until baby boy arrives...and he's going to arrive, and I have to, and I do believe he's going to be well, especially since I've just sent Woody off to collect a stupidly expensive,but beautiful pram to push him around in. (I was brave and talked prams over the phone with a salesman, and didn't cry even when he suggested I pay a deposit for it now and collect it after the baby was born...maybe he has experience of dead baby returns...who knows.)

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10 comments

  1. Oh, I'm teary after almost all of your posts, but now I am also smiling because I am imagining your little chap dressed in some kind of Sherlock Holmes tweed outfit :)

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  2. Sounds like a lovely time, and a big step in getting a pram. Big ((hugs)) to you. Thinking of you lots.

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  3. I love tweed, and I think its lovely that you still have that create spark to make things for him. I had so much of that last time and this time I've let my sewing machine and serger languish in the pantry. Made a few pairs of longies but they have sat with their hems undone, and I'm afraid to finish them lest that mean I'm done "preparing" and that means now I only have to wait (enter feeling of impending doom).

    Did you get the Stokke stroller? Or another? One thing I have been binging on is Didymos wraps, which in themselves have a benign non-babyness somehow, but I'm probably extremely delusional at this point.

    Thinking of you, praying we get to keep these two in a few weeks time...

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  4. Roof, you made me laugh imagining a little sherlock!

    Mindy, yep I got the Stokke. I can totally understand the didymos buying though, I have a few of those already. :0)

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  5. Am so pleased you all managed a break away, and what a lovely photo of you all, especially you and bump.

    Rooting for you and keeping up those prayers!
    Big hugs San xxx

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  6. You will not regret getting an Xplory. They rock!

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  7. Anonymous12:53 am

    Sorry to hear about you wobbles. Glad you and the family are having fun. Think about you always. (((Hugs)))

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  8. Tummy bugs always have the best timing! Glad you were well enough to still go. Well done you on spoiling yourself with a nice pram, can't wait to see piccies :D

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  9. Tummy bugs always have the best timing! Glad you were well enough to still go. Well done you on spoiling yourself with a nice pram, can't wait to see piccies :D

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  10. Glad you had a good holiday. Love Scotland, such fab scenery.
    Missed you! he he xxx

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