Day Twenty Seven

9:24 pm

Day 27 - your worst habit

I'm not sure about this question. I think Woody would say it's thinking too much, but I really can't help that can I? How do you stop thinking?
There have been times when I've thought it'd be nice not to overthink every little detail of my life, and I do try very very hard to stay in the moment, which is a real challenge for me.I think sometimes I do manage it.

Other than the thinking stuff,I guess my worst habit really has to be eating too much. I'm a total comfort eater, more so since Florence was born.(You know I still struggle with which word to use here, born or died? It's too harsh to write died all the time,but that would really be the right word.)
I make excuses for my greed, I'm sad,apparently eating lowers cortisol levels,I don't drink anymore (far too afraid of alcohol and it's affects since Florence..),I'm (attempting) breastfeeding...
The truth is,I'm overweight,and it doesn't feel good, and I should just get a grip.

Don't be shy, say hello!

3 comments

  1. I can hold my hand up to this too. Having your baby die is one hell of a thing to need comforting for. There isn't enough food in the world ... doesn't stop me trying though.

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  2. I can really, truly empathise with that feeling of needing to get a grip on comfort eating...

    That said, there are many, many reasons why people do it. I would imagine that losing a child/grief would be at the top of any list of potential stresses and triggers for wanting comfort. What person with a comfort eating issue wouldn't resort to that pattern of behaviour in your situation?!

    Whilst I can hear your need to find other ways to cope with losing Florence, please be gentle with your post-partum milk making mama body and your beautiful, aching, hurting soul.

    XXX

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  3. Comfort eating and thinking too much. My worst traits too. Both I wish I could kick. My best friend is always telling me to stop thinking.
    I agree with Sarah too. You are still BFing and you need to be gentle with yourself. You look great! You really do. Having children is going to change us.

    I was at the swimming pool yesterday (Brynns swimming lessons) and a lady of about 60 came out from the pool and got dressed infront of Brynn and I. Brynn ..being her usual self was chatting away to her. This lady was about the same weight as me (17 stone odd) and had obviously had a bad thing happen to her leg at some point as most of the muscle was missing from her calf. And she hapilly got dried and dressed talking to Brynn. Didn't bat an eye lid or try to hide anything.
    I wish I could be that un self contious. OK .. I want to loose weight for my health but I want to do it for that. NOT what other people and most especially ME think of myself iykwim?

    You are beautiful and are still BFing a beautiful baby.

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